Drowning in Second Chances

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Im a villain. A total Mean Girl.

Ten years ago, I leveraged a family debt to force Julian Sterling to marry me.

I forcibly tore him apart from his soulmate, Annie Clarke, and made him hate my guts. He loathed me for a decade.

But later, when we were trapped in a catastrophic flood, he swam against the current, exhausting every ounce of his strength to save me.

When the water rose again, threatening to swallow us whole, he lifted me high above his head, keeping me safe while the deluge consumed him.

The water crept over his lips, then filled his lungs.

In his final moment, Julian looked at me with a mix of regret and relief.

"Nessa, you have to be brave and live on, even if you're alone."

"If only... I had been brave enough to refuse you back then."

At the funeral, the Sterlings cursed me. They called me a curse, said I killed their son.

They sobbed, saying they never should have forced him to marry me.

Everyone said I killed him. Including me.

On the night I left the Sterling estate, I sank into a bathtub and let the water take me, drowning myself in penance.

But when I opened my eyes, I was back.

Back to the day Julians parents were forcing him to marry me.

This time, Im putting away my delusions.

I just hope that all the regrets of his past life can be made right in this one.

"I won't marry Vanessa Winslow. Even if it means giving up the CEO position at Sterling Corp, I won't do it!"

The moment I opened my eyes, I heard that familiar voice.

It felt surreal.

I turned to look at his facedetermined, handsome, alive. Tears instantly blurred my vision.

"Nessa, don't think that giving me those puppy dog eyes will make me soft. Im not marrying you!"

"I love someone else, and it isn't you!"

Julian looked at me with a complicated expression, his voice booming with resolve.

Even his parents, Mr. and Mrs. Sterling, were shocked by his intensity. They looked uncomfortable.

But me? I laughed.

Looking at this Julian, who was acting completely different from the resigned man in the original timeline, I knew.

He came back too.

We were both back at the turning point of our fate.

In the last life, Julian didn't want to marry me either, but he caved under pressure. He spent the next ten years regretting it.

This time, I wasn't heartbroken by his rejection.

I was relieved.

I was so incredibly lucky that it wasn't too late.

I turned to the Sterlings and spoke calmly.

"Since Julian's heart belongs to someone else, I won't force him."

"Uncle, Auntie, lets settle this today. Ill accept Julian as my godbrother. From now on, Im just family. I won't have any other ideas."

Just like Julians refusal, my answer was absolute.

I wiped the tear from the corner of my eye and smiled at Julian.

"Brother."

He whipped his head around, staring at me in disbelief.

The determination on his face vanished, replaced by pure shock.

In the last life, I was shameless. I clung to him like a parasite.

The Sterlings forced his hand because they owed my family. I got what I wanted.

But he lived in hell.

For ten years, he drank himself into a stupor every night. No matter how much I dressed up or begged, he wouldn't touch me.

Eventually, I pressured his parents again, saying I wanted an heir.

Julian panicked. He renovated a room in the house into a private chapel.

He started studying theology, locking himself away.

One time, I broke into his sanctuary and stole the wooden prayer beads he cherisheda gift from Annie.

When he found out, he begged me with red, swollen eyes.

"Give them back. I'll do anything you want."

I still remember how pathetic and helpless he looked.

He closed his eyes in despair and let me have my way with him.

What he didn't know was that I had already cut those beads apart and burned them in the fireplace.

Seeing my change of heart, Mr. and Mrs. Sterling let out a sigh of relief.

They quickly released a statement announcing me as their goddaughter.

From then on, Julian was just my "brother."

To smooth things over, they threw a gala.

At the party, I saw her again. Annie Clarke. Julians white moonlight.

Unlike methe villainess in designer silkshe wore a simple white dress. No makeup, pure innocence.

Just standing there, she drew more eyes than I ever could.

Julian frowned and immediately stepped between us, shielding her.

He lowered his voice, pleading.

"This is your adoption party. Don't cause a scene, please."

I smiled faintly, but my fingernails dug into my palms.

My reputation as a monster was clearly deep-rooted in his mind.

In the past, I would have exploded. If he told me not to do something, Id do it twice.

Even that flood happened because I insisted on going to a remote island for our tenth anniversary against his wishes.

I was supposed to die there. He took my place.

This time, I nodded obediently.

"I know, Brother. I'll sit right here. I won't cause trouble."

Julian looked surprised, like he was in a fever dream.

He opened his mouth but said nothing.

The party started, and Julian had to go mingle.

Annie seized the moment. She walked over to me with a glass of red wine, stopping a safe three feet away. She looked at me timidly.

"Congratulations, Miss Winslow."

Before I could reply, she downed her entire glass in one go.

Her pale face instantly flushed pink.

No wonder Julian couldn't forget her. That face was made for pity.

"Congrats on what? We're just siblings now. You're the one who should be congratulated."

"He's never stopped loving you. You know that, right?"

I grabbed a glass and took a huge gulp.

The alcohol burned, suppressing the acid rising in my throat.

I exhaled, the smell of wine drifting toward her.

She was a lightweight. She stumbled, looking like she was about to faint.

Julian sprinted over like an Olympian and slammed into my right arm.

Red wine splashed all over my couture gown. My makeup was ruined.

He caught Annie, his eyes burning with rage.

"Vanessa! You promised me! You said you wouldn't cause trouble!"

His accusation was loud. He completely ignored the fact that I had been sitting there quietly the whole time.

But I got it.

I had a rap sheet a mile long. Why would he trust me?

I used to bully Annie constantly. She was his secretary, but I treated her like my personal servant.

I slapped her once. I made her run across the city for dumplings.

In my last life, the more he loved her, the more crazy jealous I got.

I forgot that cruelty only pushes people closer together.

Like right now.

Annie leaned against Julians chest, trying to explain through her dizziness.

"No, Mr. Sterling... I drank too fast. I got dizzy."

Julians face was dark. He cut her off.

"You don't need to protect her. Vanessa needs to learn to take responsibility for her actions!"

Seeing him defend her so fiercely broke me.

I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing back the tears.

I bowed to Annie.

"I'm sorry. For everything I did in the past. I won't bother you again."

When I looked up, I met Julians gaze.

His eyes were stormy, unreadable.

I smiled calmly.

"Is that enough, Brother? If we're done here, I'm leaving."

I didn't wait for a response. I turned and walked away.

The second my back was to them, liquid ran down my face. I couldn't tell if it was wine or tears.

It felt like a boulder was crushing my chest.

The next day, I had Annie transferred back to Julians department.

I told the Sterlings I was moving out.

I used to be shameless about living in their villa just to be near Julian. In the last life, I stayed there for ten years.

Now, it was time to go.

The Sterlings hesitated.

"Nessa, we really wanted you as a daughter-in-law, but Julian..."

"It's okay, Auntie. Julian deserves someone he loves. Annie is great. If he marries her, he'll be happy."

Julian, this is the last thing I can do for you.

I wheeled my suitcase out the front door.

And ran right into him.

Julian had just come back from the office. He stared at me, his expression complex.

When he saw the suitcase, his voice dropped an octave.

"It's late. Where are you going with that?"

I stood before him, the obsessed look in my eyes completely gone.

"Brother, I want to live on my own."

"No! I forbid it!"

He rejected the idea instantly.

I paused. I expected resistance, but not this fast.

It was just like when he rejected my love in the past.

"Impossible. Don't even think about it."

He coughed, realizing he was too agitated.

"I promised your parents Id take care of you."

"You live here. No one is kicking you out."

I looked at him in surprise.

In the past, he tried everything to get rid of me. I was the one who refused to leave.

But now that we were "siblings," maybe he felt a duty.

He just hated the idea of marrying me.

"No thanks. I prefer being alone."

Julian froze. He didn't expect me to say no.

I walked past him.

When I was out the gate, he finally snapped.

"Vanessa, do you have to force me like this?"

I turned back, confused.

Julians fists were clenched, his body shaking with humiliation and anger.

He slumped his shoulders, looking at me with dead eyes.

"I won't marry Annie. Are you happy now?"

I stared at him, stunned.

He let out a scornful laugh.

"You brought Annie up in front of my parents on purpose, didn't you? To get this result?"

"You knew they wouldn't let me marry a woman from a lower class, so you provoked them!"

"Vanessa, your heart is filthy."

My brain buzzed. Static noise.

My heart felt like someone was wringing it out like a wet towel.

Julian looked utterly defeated.

"No... I didn't mean..."

He didn't let me finish. He stumbled up the stairs and slammed the door.

I watched him go, hating myself.

Why does everything I do make it worse?

I don't blame him.

If anyone is to blame, it's me. I did too much evil in my past life.

No one trusts a villain on a redemption arc.

I blinked back the tears and left the estate.

I checked into a high-end hotel.

I couldn't sleep. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw Julian drowning.

The sensation of water filling my lungs... I knew it too well.

Knock, knock.

I jumped.

I opened the door to find Annie standing there.

She was wearing a housekeeping uniform.

"Miss Winslow? Do you need turndown service?"

I gaped at her. "Aren't you a secretary at Sterling Corp? Why are you a maid?"

Annie gave a bitter smile and shook her head.

She walked in to clean. While wiping a table, she accidentally sliced her finger on my eyebrow razor.

Blood dripped.

Without warning, she fainted.

I froze. Before I could check on her, a massive force slammed into me.

I flew backward, my lower back hitting the corner of the desk hard. I bit my tongue to keep from screaming.

Julian was there.

He looked at Annie with panic, wrapping her finger in a tissue and scooping her up.

When he looked at me, his eyes were full of disgust.

"So this is why you moved out? Vanessa, does your word mean nothing?"

"I promised I wouldn't marry her, and you still want to torture her?"

"She was fired from the Group. Shes scrubbing toilets in a hotel. Why can't you let her go?"

He stopped yelling and looked at me with exhaustion.

"What do I have to do to make you stop?"

Hearing his hoarse accusation, I trembled. My eyes burned.

I laughed softly.

"If I told you I had nothing to do with this, would you believe me?"

Julians face was ice cold.

He shook his head slowly.

"Last chance, Vanessa. I hope this is the last time."

"Or else, don't blame me for forgetting our families' friendship."

He turned and left.

I clutched my bruising back, drained of energy.

I watched the empty doorway, and the tears finally fell.

He will never believe me.

Leaving is the only option. It's the only way to stop hurting him and the woman he loves.

I packed my bag and checked out.

I hailed a rideshare to the airport.

At a red light, my car pulled up next to Julians.

He saw me. He turned his head away calmly, avoiding my gaze.

He rolled up the window, sealing us in two different worlds.