No Spring Can Undo This Winter

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Flora Pruitt and I were the famous twins of Los Angeles. She was the dazzling dance student, and I was just her control group the shadow she'd been cast against since we were children.

Freshman year, the campus heartthrob chased me like it was the event of the season. He carried me to class and back every day, told me his heart ached for me.

Everyone said I'd hit the jackpot, and slowly my cold little heart started to thaw under all that warmth.

Then came my birthday. The party ended, the rain came down hard, and out of habit I reached for him. He carried me out through the door while his friends whistled, and then, right before we reached the car, he let go of me.

I dragged myself up, wiped the mud and rain off my face, and looked at him laughing with the crowd behind him.

"Flora bet me five grand I couldn't land you in a month. Turns out you didn't make me lose."

"So easy to fool!"

I slapped him across the face, and after that I sealed myself off completely.

I poured everything I had into studying. Top of the department, year after year.

Senior year, a few thugs cornered me in a corner of the dining hall. Edmund Gilbert rushed in and pulled me out of it. He took a knife to the arm, more than a dozen stitches, and a scar that would never go away.

He told me, "Effie Pruitt, from now on I'll protect you."

The night before graduation, we gave ourselves to each other.

It hurt so much I cried, and he kissed me and said he'd be good to me for the rest of my life.

But the next day, backstage at the graduation hall, I overheard him talking to his buddies.

"Edmund, so what's it like, being the one to take Effie Pruitt's first?"

"Practice." He laughed. "Flora's terrified of pain. She wanted me to get the experience first. That way I'd know what I was doing, and it wouldn't hurt her when the time came."

His friend whistled. "So does Effie Pruitt know?"

"What if she does? She's a cripple. Who else would want her but me?"

My phone buzzed. A message from my professor.

"The confirmation letter for the combined master'sCPhD track at the New York university. Are you still signing?"

My hands were shaking as I typed.

"No. I'm applying for that classified program out West."

The wind in the hallway had turned my eyes red.

"Well, well, Edmund. You really are something."

"And here we actually thought you'd fallen for a cripple."

Edmund laughed.

"Do I have that little taste? I was just banking some experience."

One of his buddies said, marveling, "You even hired a few thugs and staged a whole show to make Effie Pruitt fall for you. And look at her now. She's crazy about you."

Edmund's voice dropped low.

"She's easy to fool."

He paused, then added one more line.

"Easy to sleep with, too."

The guys burst out laughing, the sound bouncing down the hallway.

I clenched my fists tight and turned and walked away.

My first time had, honestly, been awful.

The space in the car was too cramped, and I'd cried the whole way through the pain, but I bore it willingly, for him.

And in the end, from start to finish, I was the only one who'd fallen.

Treated like a fool, spun in circles.

Back in the dorm, I opened my laptop, pulled up the confirmation page for the program out West, and clicked confirm.

My phone rang. One of Edmund's buddies.

"Effie Pruitt, come out for karaoke!"

"I'm not coming."

"Oh, come on, Edmund's here! He's had too much to drink, hurry up and come, or there's no one to take him home."

The call ended, and an address came through.

I hesitated for a few seconds, then went anyway.

I pushed open the door of the private room and stepped inside. A whole ring of people, every one of them dressed to the nines, gathered around Flora Pruitt wishing her a happy birthday.

Flora saw me and frowned.

"Effie, did you buy that outfit back in middle school? It looks so dated. Why are you still wearing it? Anyone who didn't know better would think our family mistreated you."

I lowered my head and said nothing.

Someone seemed to snap out of it.

"Oh, right, it's Effie's birthday today too. Effie, what's your birthday wish?"

Flora cut in first, smiling as she said,

"Her birthday wish was to date Edmund. Already came true."

She turned to look at me.

"Effie, why don't you dance for us? You've had a bad leg since you were little, always sneaking looks at me dancing. You must really want to try, don't you?"

Someone in the crowd spoke up.

"Come on, her leg's bad, how's she supposed to dance?"

Flora tilted her head, her voice all innocence and concern.

"It's because her leg's bad that she should dance even more. You all keep treating her like an invalid and letting her off, and she'll never get past it."

The words had barely landed when a hard shove pushed me into the middle.

"Dance! Dance! Dance!"

I lost my balance and hit the floor hard.

My left leg wouldn't hold. I struggled twice and couldn't get up.

The drinks on the table went over, all of it spilling down onto me.

Liquor dripped from my hair and stuck wet against my face.

Laughter broke out all around.

I looked over at Edmund. The smile still hadn't left the corner of his mouth.

My gaze moved across his arm, and I saw the horrifying scar was gone.

So today, coming to celebrate Flora's birthday, he hadn't even bothered to stick the fake on to fool me.

My chest clenched hard, something sour surging up.

Flora reached down to help me up.

"You awful people, don't you dare laugh at my sister!"

"She didn't choose to have a bad leg."

She looked at me, beaming.

"Happy birthday, sis. Come to our dance studio next time and I'll teach you."

Someone egged him on.

"Mr. Gilbert, what birthday gift did you get?"

Edmund took out two boxes and handed one to Flora first.

She opened it. A gemstone necklace, the shine of it almost painful to look at.

The box in my hands got plucked away by Flora and opened.

Five pairs of white socks. Cheap, off a street stall.

Plain white, coarse, cheap.

Like me in Edmund's eyes.

Edmund's tone was flat.

"Effie, you never wear jewelry, so I got you something practical."

The room went quiet for a beat.

Then someone snorted out a laugh.

I dropped the socks and turned to walk out.

As I pushed the door open, Flora called after me,

"Sis, what's wrong? We haven't even cut the cake yet."

Edmund threw out an arm to stop me.

"Stop! What's with the temper?"

His brow furrowed, his voice full of impatience.

"Get back here. Don't ruin the mood."

I stopped, turned around, and looked straight at him.

Then I said it slowly.

"Let's break up, Edmund."

The air went silent all at once.

Edmund froze for a second, then jerked his head up.

His brow knotted tight.

"Effie, you really have to make a scene right now?"

I didn't answer. I gave a small, bitter laugh, turned, and left.

Flora's voice drifted after me.

"My sister's been like this since she was little her leg's bad, and she's very sensitive. It's my fault, I helped Edmund pick out the gift, I should've thought it through more"

Her voice was full of apology.

"Should I go find her and explain?"

Edmund gave a cold laugh.

"Let her go! We'll keep celebrating."

The next day, my mother sent a message telling me to come home.

I'd barely pushed the door open when a slap landed across my face.

My cheek stung, burning in an instant.

My mother glared at me, shoving her phone up to my face, her voice shrill.

"What is this?! Effie, how could you be so shameless?!"

My face went white in an instant.

On the screen was the video from that day in the car, the one Edmund had coaxed me into letting him film.

He'd said it was just a keepsake, that he swore he'd never send it to anyone.

I'd believed him.

I never thought Edmund would casually let Flora watch something that private between us.

Cold spread through me, and my throat felt like a hand was crushing it shut.

Flora stood off to the side and let out a sigh.

"Sis, Mom's heart isn't good. How could you do something like this? She's absolutely furious"

Dad slammed his hand down on the table.

"This is disgraceful! If you had even half of Flora's sense, you'd never have pulled something so out of line!"

He jabbed a finger at my face.

"Fine, then. You can earn your own tuition from now on! You seem to think you're so capable!"

The air choked out of my chest, like I'd taken a fist straight to it.

I opened my mouth, and not a single word came out.

Dad went on.

"Twins, twins, so how does one turn out so brilliant, and the other end up a cripple who still loves playing dirty tricks?"

Flora hooked her arms around Dad's and gave it a little shake.

"That's enough, Dad, don't say that. Sis will get upset. Then she'll go and secretly toss or smash the limited-edition pieces in my room again, and I'll be the one who suffers."

Mom and Dad's faces darkened further.

I drew in a deep breath.

All these years, Flora had conjured up things out of nothing more times than I could count.

Every single one ended the same way, with me getting yelled at, me apologizing, me kneeling in the living room in tears writing out a confession.

And I'd actually believed Edmund wouldn't show that video to anyone.

I was too stupid.

"Flora." I looked at her. "You've been the center of everyone's world your whole life. Why do you need to tell these lies to make Mom and Dad hate me?"

Her expression crumpled into hurt at once.

"Sis, how can you think that of me? You've done so many things to bully me, but we're sisters after all, blood is thicker than water. I never held any of it against you."

Dad's voice came out cold.

"If only Flora were the only daughter we had."

Years of swallowed hurt and anger crested all at once.

"I'm not coming back to this house again." My eyes swept over them. "From now on, pretend you never had this daughter."

Dad was shaking with rage.

"Fine! You think you're something! Walk out that door and don't you dare come back!"

I lifted my hand and slowly wiped away the thread of blood at the corner of my mouth.

This house had never seemed to have any room for me.

For as long as I could remember, I was always the one overlooked.

Everything Flora did was endearing. She said I'd stolen things from her room, and Mom and Dad believed it without question.

No matter how I explained, no one believed me, because I was a cripple.

Right. In their eyes, why would Flora ever lie to frame a cripple?

She lacked nothing.

Everything I lacked, she had.

My eyes burned and stung. I turned and left.

It didn't matter. I was only a few days away from leaving for out West anyway.

When I reached the bottom of the dorm building, I spotted a Ferrari parked at the curb.

Edmund stood beside it in sunglasses, drawing sidelong stares from everyone around.

"A whole night. No call, no message. Are you done throwing your fit?"

I said nothing.

He took a step forward.

"Yesterday was your fault. Go apologize to Flora. She was scared you'd be angry, cried half the night."

"I'm not apologizing."

I let out a laugh, all of it scorn.

"If she was so scared I'd misunderstand, why didn't she come find me herself?"

"And, Edmund, I thought I made it clear yesterday. We're over."

Rage filled his eyes in an instant, and he grabbed my arm.

"Effie, what do you mean? I never agreed to break up. You say it's over and it's over?"

I wrenched free of him.

"Whether I mean anything to you, you know that better than anyone."

"Edmund, I thought you were different from other men. Turns out I was wrong about you."

His brow knotted, and something flickered deep in his eyes before he pushed it back down.

"So it's that the gift I gave you was too cheap?"

"Fine. In a couple of days I'll buy you a Bulgari bracelet. Happy now?"

His voice dropped, coaxing.

"You're about to start at the New York university soon, and I'm heading back to New York to take over the family business right around then. We'll have all the time in the world together. Stop throwing a tantrum."

A moment later he added one more line.

"I honestly thought you weren't the type to care so much about material things."

I lifted my head and looked at him, not blinking.

Every sentence was exactly like before, and back then I never caught it. Every word out of him was a put-down.

The joke of it was, the old me hadn't even felt anything wrong.

"I said, we're done."

Then I turned and walked away.

Behind me came his voice, grinding through his teeth.

"Effie Pruitt, you're going to regret this!"

Back in my dorm, I opened my laptop. My application to the Western research program had been approved.

The place was remote, the conditions rough, no signal of any kind, hardly anyone willing to go.

Which suited me. I didn't want anyone to be able to find me either.

The days that followed were packed. Thesis defense, project paperwork, busy from morning to night.

Edmund didn't come looking for me again, and I stopped thinking about him.

Until one day, someone kicked the dorm door open.

Edmund stood in the doorway, eyes bloodshot.

"Effie Pruitt, get out here!"

I stared at him, thrown.

"Is something wrong?"

He didn't say a word. He seized my wrist, dragged me out, and threw me into the car.

He floored it.

At the hospital, he shoved me into a ward.

He pointed at Flora Pruitt lying in the bed.

"If you've got a grudge, take it out on me. Why hit your own sister with a car?"

I had no idea what he was talking about.

"What are you talking about?"

In the bed, Flora lay with her right leg in a thick cast, her face bone-white.

Two police officers sat beside her, taking a statement.

Flora's voice was faint.

"I was crossing the street when I saw a car coming straight at me. I tried to dodge and still got clipped. I got one look, and the person in the driver's seat... looked like my sister..."

The instant my parents saw me, the hatred in their eyes came at me like knives.

"Effie Pruitt! How could you be so cruel?!"

"She's your own sister, and you ran her down with a car?!"

"She's about to leave for her overseas tour. You're trying to ruin her whole life!"

Then the police spoke up too, saying the security footage had caught a blurry figure whose build was a close match to mine.

Flora's voice drifted out, light as air.

"Don't blame my sister... I'm sure she didn't mean to..."

I stood where I was, cold all over.

My throat felt stuffed with cotton. I couldn't get out a single word.

Just then, the phone in my pocket buzzed.

A message from a friend.

"Effie! Go look online, now! Something's happened!"

I opened the link she'd sent. The headline was glaring.

The article read like it had all the details too, claiming I'd used my disability to milk sympathy, that I'd cozied up to a professor to trade for a project slot, and that I'd frozen out and bullied the other students in my group.

Below it hung the story about me hitting my sister with a car, along with a blurred private video.

The face was fuzzed out, but anyone who knew me would recognize me in a glance.

The internet went up in flames.

"Shameless, honestly! Bad enough she gets special treatment, but this cruel on top of it?"

"I heard she bullied her own sister every single day. Drove her to the point she couldn't take it anymore."

"Ran over her own sister over a birthday present? Her heart must be made of stone."

Every comment was uglier than the last.

They locked me in a detention cell.

My parents watched them take me away, their eyes cold, like they were looking at a stranger. Not once, from start to finish, did they speak up for me.

I was pushed into a cramped little cell.

It was cold and damp, black on every side, my hand finding no wall when I reached out.

When we were kids, Flora pulled a prank and shut me in the basement for eight straight hours. That time my heart nearly stopped.

The old fear came flooding back, and I huddled in the corner, shaking uncontrollably.

I don't know how long it was before Edmund came.

Light stabbed in, and I lifted a hand on reflex to shield my eyes.

His voice was cold.

"Effie Pruitt, you hurt Flora. You should pay the price."

I was trembling all over, terrified he'd leave me alone in here.

"Edmund, I was wrong once I'm out I'll apologize to Flora to her face, I'll do anything you want please don't leave me in here, I'm scared of the dark"

When he'd heard me out, he suddenly let out a laugh, like he'd just heard the biggest joke in the world.

"Enough, drop the act. You pulled all this, and now you're putting on a show for who? Sit in there and reflect for a few days."

My throat closed up, my voice so hoarse it was barely there.

"You used to say you'd protect me. Was all of that just a lie?"

He paused, his voice lower than before.

"Effie, you did something wrong. Taking some punishment is only fair. You'll be out in a few days anyway. Look after yourself."

He turned and left, and the light vanished again.

I curled up in the corner, tears falling without a sound.

I thought that was as bad as it could get.

But I was moved to another cell, and the women I was housed with fixed their sights on me.

They beat me until my head was split and bleeding.

And kicked three of my ribs until they broke.

"Let me be straight with you. Somebody on the outside told us to take real good 'care' of you!"

I clenched my fists, hatred surging up in me.

Edmund, I hate you.

The guards came in once, said I started it, said I had it coming.

With broken ribs, all I could do was lie stiff on the floor, unable even to turn over, kept awake by the pain at night.

For seven whole days, I barely closed my eyes.

Only when my body gave out completely did they carry me out and take me to a hospital.

I lay in the hospital bed, and my phone screen lit up.

"Heard you're out. Come apologize to Flora and we'll put this behind us. She's soft-hearted, she doesn't blame you anymore."

I looked at that line, and a sharp pain shot through my ribs.

I didn't reply with a single word. I just blocked him.

Not long after, my advisor called. The Western program was going ahead as planned, and my place hadn't changed.

But I had to leave immediately.

I gritted my teeth and pulled the IV out of the back of my hand.

Got dressed, called a car, and headed straight for the airport.

I brought nothing. My backpack held only my ID and my phone.

Before boarding, I threw the phone straight into a trash can.

On Edmund's end, after that message went out, there was never any reply.

He waited three days. Nothing.

He went to the Pruitt house to ask, and they said I'd never come home.

My roommate said I'd cleared out all my things and never shown up again.

He started to feel something was wrong, and turned and went to the department office.

"Excuse me, has Effie Pruitt completed her enrollment paperwork for the university? Where is she now?"

The teacher looked up at him, pushed his glasses up.

"She gave up on the university ages ago. You didn't know?"