You'll Never Find Another Gold Digger as Sensible as Me
Plot Summary
As Mrs. Farley, the unnamed narrator goes to take her one-month-old daughter's photos with her husband Austin Farley, when Austin's ex Janice Henson publicly begs Austin to leave the narrator for her. Austin rejects Janice, but soon asks the narrator for a divorce and offers her 30 million to move out.
The narrator calmly agrees to the divorce, but Austin grows confused and upset by her lack of panic. When a storm hits after the shoot, the narrator waits for Austin to pick her and her daughter up, only to find out he is with another man, leaving them stranded in the rain.
Search Tags
- Character-focused: Austin Farley, The Narrator and Austin Farley, Janice Henson and Austin Farley
- Plot-focused: what happens to the narrator in You'll Never Find Another Gold Digger as Sensible as Me, does Austin Farley divorce the narrator
Character Relationships
- Austin Farley & The Unnamed Narrator: They are married with a newborn daughter. Austin suspects the narrator is a gold digger only interested in his money, offers her 30 million for a divorce, but becomes irritated when she accepts the divorce calmly. He shows conflicting affection and coldness toward her.
- Austin Farley & Janice Henson: Janice Henson is Austin's ex girlfriend and the narrator's best friend. She still has feelings for Austin, publicly begs him to leave the narrator and get back together with her, and has turned Austin against the narrator by claiming the narrator is only after his money.
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On the way to take our daughter's one-month photos with Austin Farley, my best friend stopped the car in front of everyone.
I regret it.
I never should have stepped aside and let you have Sharon Summers. She's a gold digger. All she ever wanted was your money!
Let's get back together. Please?
Something flickered in Austin's eyes, a moment of hesitation, but in the end he drove around Janice Henson and left.
Quietly, I let out a breath.
Grateful that I still had my place as Mrs. Farley.
But during the shoot, Austin suddenly backed me into a corner and said, cold as anything, "Thirty million. Move out."
"Fine. I'll step aside for Janice."
I nodded, clutching the hem of my clothes.
"A gold digger through and through."
Anger flashed in his eyes, and right then he made a call, telling someone to bring the divorce papers.
But a gold digger as reasonable as me? You'll never find another one.
Plenty of men would jump at the chance to marry me.
...
The divorce papers arrived.
Austin tossed a pen at me at once.
I took it, and just as I was about to sign, he caught my wrist.
"Last night in bed you were screaming that you couldn't live without me."
"Now, facing a divorce, you're this calm. Janie was right. You really are a gold digger."
Austin stared hard into my eyes.
As if searching for the smallest flicker of panic, of pleading.
I didn't quite understand it.
He was the one who'd brought up the divorce. I'd agreed. And now he was upset again.
"Why aren't you saying anything?"
Austin let go of my wrist. "Don't tell me a gold digger like you has pride too?"
He said it with a sneer, then turned and walked off.
I rubbed my wrist and signed my name on the papers.
What gold digger doesn't love money?
And besides, this was a full thirty million!
By the time our daughter's photos were done.
A storm had broken outside.
Austin texted me on his own: Twenty minutes. I'll come pick you both up.
Something in my chest trembled.
I suddenly remembered the day I gave birth. The rain had been even heavier, and Austin had dropped his business partners and rushed to the hospital in a panic.
He'd stayed by me the whole night.
In that moment, I couldn't have said how happy I was.
Even a gold digger everyone laughed at could have her spring.
Buzz, buzz!
Then Austin sent another message: Don't let our daughter catch a chill.
I froze for a second, then managed a small smile down at the baby in my arms.
"Good girl."
"Mommy's riding on your good luck again this time!"
But twenty minutes passed, then forty... and there was still no sign of Austin.
I took out my phone, meaning to ask him, and saw Donald Gilbert's profile picture light up on my social feed.
I tapped in for a look.
Ten minutes earlier, Donald had posted a photo of himself sitting in a passenger seat.
Caption: The one who loves you will always wait for you, no matter how long it's been, no matter how far the distance, no matter the wind or the rain.
I recognized it.
That was Austin's car.
So I let go of the idea of texting Austin, and opened the ride app instead.
But the rain was too heavy.
No one accepted the ride.
I thought I'd go back inside the photo studio to wait it out, but the manager stopped me.
"I'm sorry."
"We don't receive people who have no business here. Please don't put us in a difficult spot."
My wedding photos and my portrait sessions had all been taken here.
It was the first time I'd been treated like this.
I couldn't help asking, "Is this Austin's doing?"
The manager said nothing.
I didn't press for more. I only said, "I won't come in. Just let me put my daughter inside."
"She's too little. She'll catch cold."
The manager hesitated, but still wouldn't agree.
My nose stung, and something sat heavy and wrong in my chest.
I remembered when our daughter was just born.
Austin had held her and wouldn't let go, saying he'd spoil her into the happiest little princess in the world.
And now he didn't care at all.
Then, out of nowhere!
Several cars tore past, throwing up a sheet of water more than six feet high.
I spun around quickly, shielding my daughter against me.
And got drenched like a soaked cat myself!
It happened again and again, until I couldn't hold back a sneeze.
Even the blanket wrapped around my daughter was soaked through in a wide patch.
So she wailed and wailed.
The people at the photo studio wouldn't help.
I couldn't get a ride.
Just as panic was clawing at me, another car came toward us, and right as I was about to flinch away, it slowed.
Slowly it pulled up beside me.
Then the door opened, and a low voice came from inside.
"Vivi, get in."
Justin?
He'd been a year ahead of me in school.
I was afraid my daughter would catch a chill, so without thinking twice I climbed straight into the car, and only then asked, How did you know I was here?
I just happened to pass by.
Justin smiled and opened the console compartment.
Inside were fresh towels and blankets, warm water, diapers.
Thank you.
I picked up a blanket as I said it.
No need to be so formal with me.
Then he asked, I heard Janice came back to get Austin to take her back. What are you going to do?
Respect their choice.
There wasn't a trace of hesitation in me.
If you ever need anything, call me. Any time.
Justin nodded and handed me a business card.
By the time I got home.
Austin was sitting on the sofa. He looked up, saw me dripping wet from head to toe, and frowned.
Why are you only getting back now? Looking like a drowned dog, filthy. You know I like things clean, that I can't stand a mess.
Don't tell me you did it on purpose. Trying to destroy the divorce papers while you were at it.
I shook my head and pulled the papers out from inside my jacket.
Apart from a few creases.
They were perfectly clean.
Something startled flickered through Austin's eyes.
I turned and carried my daughter toward the bedroom, and there behind the door was a single high heel, dirtied.
Janice had been here. There was no doubt.
The reason I was so sure was that I'd given Janice those heels for her birthday.
Once, Janice, Austin, Justin, and I had all grown up together.
Janice and I were closer than that. We shared everything.
She helped me chase Austin.
I helped her chase Justin.
Later, when Austin accepted my confession, Janice said she was happy for me, that she envied me for getting to be with the one I loved.
I always believed she meant it from the heart.
Until my wedding day, when Janice, blind drunk, said that she and Austin were the ones who'd wanted each other.
She even produced a love letter Austin had written.
Austin didn't deny it. He only said it was all in the past.
But after that, the rumor spread everywhere that I was a gold digger, that I'd only been with Austin for the money.
Austin said it didn't matter.
But the truth was, he'd never let go of the past, and he'd believed long before then that I was a gold digger.
I finished feeding my daughter, took a quick shower, and went to bed.
I don't know how long I slept.
I woke groggy, my head throbbing, no strength left in my body.
Then the bedroom light came on. Austin walked in and looked at me coldly.
You still haven't answered my question.
Why did you come back so late? Is it like Janie said? Do you already have someone else out there?
But my throat felt like it was full of razor blades. I couldn't get a word out.
I could only shake my head.
Well? What's with the head-shaking? Say something! I want you to talk!
Austin, angry now, grabbed me by the arms, then went rigid and reached out to touch my forehead.
Why is your body so hot?
Our eyes met.
The next second, the disgust came right back into Austin's face. "You're doing this on purpose. Playing for sympathy."
"A gold digger is a gold digger. This sweet little act is all you've got."
"That's how you tricked me from the start, isn't it?"
So this was what he thought.
Once, when his fever wouldn't break and the hospital handed us a critical-condition notice, I knelt over and over to pray for a charm to keep him safe, until my knees were rubbed raw.
Once, when he liked paper cranes, I folded him a thousand of them.
All of it.
Every last thing, just another one of my gold-digger tricks.
The phone buzzed.
Right on cue, Janice was calling.
Austin didn't step away to hide it. He answered on speaker, right there in front of me.
"Austin."
"My nose is all stuffed up. I think I've caught a cold. Could you come over and keep me company?"
Janice's voice was soft and coaxing.
There was no stuffiness in it.
No trace of feeling unwell either.
If anything, she sounded like she was showing off. Look how someone dotes on me. Look how someone loves me.
"Wait for me!"
"I'm coming right now!"
Austin shot me one glance, then turned and left.
His steps were quick.
As if he couldn't reach Janice fast enough to hold her.
Terrified she might suffer even the smallest slight.
In that moment, something in my nose stung and I could barely hold it back, my eyes gone dry.
But who was there to cry for?
I shook my head, dragged myself up, and made my slow way downstairs against the wall to swallow a cold tablet.
Sleep was gone after that.
So I sat down beside my daughter and watched her little face.
Not long after, it vibrated again.
I picked it up. A message from Austin.
Move out of the house tomorrow.
And take the little brat with you. A daughter is nothing but a money pit.
Right after it, the bank's message came in: Ms. Summers, thirty million has been credited to your account.
I looked at that string of zeros.
I covered my mouth and coughed several times, then said to my daughter, "Baby."
"I'm sorry. From now on it's just going to be the two of us."
"But thirty million is more than enough for you and me. I'll send you to the best schools, dress you up pretty, and never let anyone push you around."
"And I'll never let you become the kind of 'gold digger' they say I am."
At that very moment.
Janice sent a video.
There was Austin, a man who'd never so much as rinsed a dish, who'd never once set foot in a kitchen, standing at the stove and working a spatula.
"Janie."
"Go easy on the spice, no peppercorns, no cilantro, right?"
Listening to it broke something in me.
I'm allergic to mango.
Yet for my birthday once, Austin had gotten me a mango cake.
I don't eat garlic.
He always forgot that too when he ordered.
I used to think it was just work. That he was too busy to keep it in his head.
Only now did I understand. His whole mind was taken up remembering everything about Janice.
There was no room left for me, the third person.
I didn't reply. I dragged my worn-out body up to pack.
This home.
Let them have it.
The farther I took my daughter, the better.
Everyone said I was a greedy gold digger.
But this gold digger had no designer clothes in her closet, no name-brand bags.
No jewelry worth millions.
Only a single ring, the one that marked the mistress of the Farley household.
Janice, on the other hand.
While she was supposedly helping me chase Austin, she'd been quietly taking plenty of expensive gifts from him.
One bracelet alone was worth three million.
Bags packed.
I sat on the couch and waited for Austin.
If we were parting.
Then I'd be taking back the token that had sealed us together.
Morning.
Austin came back.
I set the ring down in front of him. "Here's your ring. Give me the pendant."
"I gave it to Janice."
He glanced at me, then added, "She said she really liked it."
What?
For the first time I lost my composure in front of him. "That pendant was placed in your hands by my mother herself."
"It's the symbol of the Summers son-in-law. Even if we divorce, it should go back to its rightful owner. How could you just give it to someone else?"
Back then, on her sickbed, my mother had pressed the pendant into Austin's hands. "As long as the two of you live happily, I can die with no regrets."
"I have only this one daughter. I hope you'll take good care of her."
Austin had nodded again and again. "Don't worry, Mom. Even if the sky falls, I'll hold it up. Sharon is the lady of the Farley house. No one is allowed to hurt her."
Now everything was the opposite of what he'd said.
"It's just a pendant."
His face was pure indifference, and then, as if he'd seen right through me, he gave a cold snort. "I get it. You're using this as an excuse to squeeze money out of me, right?"
"Go on, say it. How much extra do you want?"
"I, Austin Farley, may not have much else, but I've got money to spare!"
His eyes were full of disgust.
My mouth opened, but all at once I didn't want to say anything. I turned, went upstairs, scooped up our daughter, grabbed the suitcase, and left.
"Hm?"
Austin froze for a second, then his brows drew together and his face went dark. "You're in that much of a hurry?"
Last night he told me to leave.
Today he said all of this.
I didn't make a sound. I kept my head down and walked, straight to Janice's place.
I meant to get the pendant back.
Janice opened the door.
I didn't beat around the bush. I told her exactly why I'd come.
But Janice only smiled, took out the pendant, and swung it carelessly in her hand.
"Sharon."
"What would you do if I smashed it?"
She asked it as if the idea amused her.
"Don't you dare!"
My hands clenched into fists.
"What's there to be afraid of? You think Austin would blame me once he found out? Keep dreaming."
Janice smiled again. "Do you know why he changed his name to Austin?"
"He said he hoped for a love that was pure and true," I answered.
"Heh."
Her mouth curled with scorn. "It's because Janice sounds like it belongs beside his. That's why. Understand?"
A shudder went through me.
So that was it.
Crack.
A sharp sound, all at once.
While I wasn't watching, Janice had smashed the pendant.
In a panic I lunged forward and shoved her hard, then crouched down to gather the broken pieces.
And in that moment.
The door swung open, and Austin walked in.
"Austin, save me!"
Janice dropped every trace of her earlier provocation. She sat on the floor and sobbed out her accusation. "Sharon rushed in and hit me. She even said she'd take a kitchen knife and chop me into pieces."
"That's not what happened. She smashed my"
I tried to explain.
What I got instead was Austin's roar.
"Shut up!"
"You gold digger! You can't even behave with a child in your arms! Sneaking over here to make trouble for Janice. So all your calm and good sense before, it was all an act!"
"You almost fooled me again!"
"You stay right here and think about what you've done!"
Austin's voice was so loud it made our daughter cry and cry.
But he paid it no mind. He lifted Janice up, his eyes full of concern. "Did the fall hurt? I'll take you to the hospital."
The door slammed shut.
Then the air conditioner in the room suddenly began blowing hot.
The display climbed from 75 degrees to 104.
I couldn't find the remote, and my phone wouldn't control it either. All I could do was call Austin.
He didn't pick up.
I messaged him instead. [The AC just switched to heat, it's at 104 degrees, our daughter won't be able to take it.]
[No matter what you think of me, she's innocent!]
Austin replied. [Hah. Trying to trick me again? Janice said the house is on cooling.]
[And even if it is heat at 104, so what? This is the punishment you deserve.]
[A gold digger like you, what kind of normal daughter could you ever produce? It's only right that she suffers a little too.]
Line by line, the words bled endless hatred.
They shattered something in me.
Left me hopeless.
Killed whatever was left in me.
My hands shaking, I swallowed the injustice and sent one more message. It showed that I'd been blocked.
With nothing else to do, I sent Justin a plea for help.
I tried to cool things with water.
The tap ran dry.
I opened the refrigerator.
The power was cut.
The room grew hotter and hotter.
I was drenched in sweat, my clothes soaked through, my head spinning.
Our daughter, worse.
Her breathing came faster and faster, her skin flushed a frightening, burning red.
Just as I was about to drop straight to the floor.
The door was kicked open.
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