Feeding My Husband To The Butcher

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My husband gave me two snakes as pets.

The eerie part? Whenever they realize Im watching, they start matingferociously, shamelessly. Its enough to make me turn away in a flush of heat.

Then, out of nowhere, the Feed flickers into my vision like a digital hallucination.

[Wow, the female lead is a genius. Getting the System to turn them into snakes so they can flaunt their "love" right under the wifes nose? Iconic.]

[LOL, theyre going at it like its a honeymoon, and the poor side-character wife is just standing there playing house. She has no idea hes going to use that snake tail to strangle her tonight.]

[Once shes out of the picture, he inherits her millions and marries the "real" lead. A classic move.]

A chill raced down my spine. I didn't hesitate. I pulled out my phone and dialed the number of a local game processora man known for his lack of mercy toward reptiles.

"Hey, Silas? Ive got two fat ones for you. I hear the meat is great for a winter stew."

I was jolted awake by a wet, rhythmic slithering soundthe sound of scales grinding against scales.

I opened my eyes to find two six-foot, iridescent "spicy noodles" dangling from my crystal chandelier. They were entwined in a tight, DNA-like spiral, their heads swaying with a sickening sort of ecstasy, tongues flicking against one another.

Their eyes looked... drunken. Almost human. Almost as if they were smiling.

A few drops of murky, white fluid dripped from their tails, landing right on the silk of my nightgown.

Again.

This was the eighteenth time theyd pulled this stunt in my bedroom.

I sat up, frustrated, and called my husband. No answer. I left a voice memo, my voice tight with irritation.

"Mark, where did you even find these things? Theyre shameless. Theyre doing it in my room every single day."

"Seriously, I dont think theyre even snakes. They don't act like them. They don't even care about the cold."

Suddenly, the air in front of me distorted. Neon text bled into my retinas.

[Hahaha... Congrats, you guessed it! They aren't snakes, honey. Thats your husband and your best friend. Surprise!]

[Theyre hitting the high notes while youre playing pet-owner. They aren't your petsthey're your executioners!]

[My girl Bridget is a mastermind. Before she cut ties with the System, she used her last points to get two transformation pills. Pure brilliance!]

[Theyre literally doing it on the wifes clothes for the thrill of it, then making her "clean" them afterward. Its so twisted, I love it!]

[Bridget is already pregnant. Its time to get rid of the wife. Cant have a baby bump showing in the wedding dress, right?]

[Don't worry, the kill happens tonight. Mark strangles her, shifts back to human form, inherits the estate, and takes Bridget home. Happily ever after!]

The words left me paralyzed with a bone-deep cold.

I looked up at the female snake. She was staring at me with a look of triumphant malice, and for a split second, I saw the shadow of Bridgetmy "soul sister," my bridesmaidin those slit pupils.

According to the Feed, Bridget was the "Protagonist" of this world. She was supposed to be building some grand empire with a supernatural System, but shed decided she wanted Mark instead. She wanted my life.

The System had abandoned her, but not before giving her the means to replace me.

The ice in my veins turned to fire. I swear I could hear Bridgets voice whispering in my mind: Look at her, Mark. Look at how stupid she is, just watching us. Its so hot.

Then, the male snakes tail tightened around her, and I heard Marks low, familiar rumble: Let her watch. Thats the point. Im going to fill you with so many legacies while she watches her world burn.

I bit my lip until it bled, using the pain to anchor myself.

I picked up the phone again.

"Silas? You said these two were big enough for a feast? They're yours. Come get them."

Silas was silent for a long beat.

Everyone in our gated community knew we were rivals. I was the "animal lover" who rescued strays; he was the man who ate anything that crawled, often tormenting the creature before he butchered it.

When Mark first brought the snakes home, Silas had smelled them from across the street. Hed offered me two thousand bucks on the spot. Id told him to go to hell.

"Cassidy?" Silas finally rasped. "What kind of game are you playing? Is this a trap?"

"You want them or not? If you don't show up in ten minutes, I'm calling the guy in the next county over."

"Wait, wait! Don't you dare give those beauties to anyone else. Im coming. Keep them locked up. Im on my way!"

The moment I hung up, the snakes tumbled from the chandelier. They began to slither across the bed in a frantic, panicked mess.

Bridgets shrill voice echoed in the room: Is she crazy? Why is she selling us?!

Marks voice was more hesitant, analytical: Relax. We know how much she loves animals. Shes spent two months nursing us like babies. That doesn't just change.

Then what is she doing?!

Its a play. She hates Silas. Shes probably setting him up. Shes told me a dozen times she wanted to take that man down.

Right. She told me the same thing. Bridget seemed to exhale. Her tail brushed against him again.

They started up again, right in front of me. The female snake arched her neck like a concubine seeking favor in an old period drama.

Baby, the antidote from the System arrives today. We need to hurry up and finish her off before we shift back, right?

Marks yellow eyes drifted toward me. His black tongue flicked out, tasting the air near my face. He didn't speak.

Bridget hissed at him. Why aren't you saying anything? Are you getting soft? You still love her, don't you? I knew it! Youre just using me!

The female snake slithered over to my dresser, her coils wrapping around a silver-framed document. She looked back at Mark, her eyes welling with a strange, reptilian moisture.

You kept your 'anniversary' souvenir. You cant bring yourself to kill her!

Before she could finish, Marks tail whipped out like a thunderbolt, shattering the glass. The shards pierced the paper.

It felt like they were piercing my heart, too.

Everyone knew the story. Mark was the high school dropout who cleaned up his act to impress me. He studied until his eyes bled just to get into the same university. Wed kept our acceptance letters framed together for yearsa symbol of his "devotion."

Now, his tail slammed into my letter with a pure, unadulterated venom.

His voice was a ghostly growl: Shes terrified of water. Im going to coil around her throat with this body she loves so much, and Im going to hold her under until the light leaves her eyes.

I stood there, stunned by the sheer depth of his cold-bloodedness.

I had been nothing but a savior to him. When his business failed, I bankrolled his lifestyle. When he was depressed, I gave him space and luxury. I had treated him better than I treated myself.

Why did he hate me so much?

I looked at the Feed.

[I knew he hated her! The more she helped him, the more he loathed her. No 'Alpha' male can handle his wife being the breadwinner and the brains.]

[That acceptance letter? Its a reminder that shes better than him. Every cent of her money he spends feels like a slap to his ego. Love died a long time ago; only resentment remains.]

[Hahaha, she deserves it. Whats the point of having money if you don't know how to act like a submissive wife? Bridget is smartershe knows how to stroke a mans ego to get what she wants.]

I let out a dry, self-deprecating laugh.

My kindness was his cage. My generosity was his insult.

I walked straight toward the snakes. They thought I was going to stroke them, to apologize. They were motionless as I grabbed them and shoved them into a heavy burlap sack.

But as I went to pull the drawstring, Marks head shot out. He moved with lightning speed, coiling his cold, muscular body around my neck.

The icy pressure tightened around my throat.

His head rose, his eyes fixed on mine, his tongue lashing against the tip of my nose. His tail tightened around my wrist like a handcuff.

I was ready to fight, ready for everything to end right here.

But then, his eyes shifted.

Mark, what are you waiting for? Do it! Bridget screamed from inside the bag.

Mark didn't tighten his grip. Instead, he slid his coils down to my abdomen, hovering there as if protecting a kill.

Shes pregnant.

The words hit me like a physical blow. I looked down at my flat stomach. Impossible. Mark had been "traveling" for months. We hadn't been together in ages.

Bridget hissed, her voice dripping with fury. I knew it! Shes been playing the loyal wife while sleeping around with some loser!

The child is mine.

Shock after shock. My mind raced back to a dream Id had two months ago. A dream of a massive serpent coiling around me in the dark, the weight of it crushing the breath from my lungs. Id woken up drenched in sweat.

It wasn't a dream. It was him.

Oh, I see. Bridgets voice turned small, wounded. If shes carrying your baby, Ill just go. I know you won't hurt your own blood. Ill leave you three to your happy family. Everything we had was just a dream.

Mark immediately hooked his tail around the bag to comfort her.

Don't do that. When did I say Id choose her? I only want children from you. Her baby? Its just an ant I haven't stepped on yet.

He looked back at me, his eyes dead.

Well send them both to the afterlife together. They can keep each other company on the long walk down.

I clenched my fists. At that moment, the doorbell rang.

Silass rough voice boomed through the door: "Cassidy! Open up! Im here for my meat!"

The two snakes froze. With a coordinated movement, they slithered out of the bag and back up to the high rafters of the living room, coiling out of reach.

I opened the door and let Silas in.

"They're inside," I said, my voice hollow. "Catch them yourself. Do whatever you want with them. I don't want to know."

I turned and walked toward the kitchen, closing the door behind me.

The Feed went into a frenzy.

[Wait, is she really leaving? Is she actually selling the protagonists? No way.]

[Mark and Bridget are panicking. They were going to kill her the second Silas left, but if she leaves the room, they can't get to her!]

[Oh no! Silas has a machete!]

[Wait! The antidote just arrived! Bridget, quickeat it!]

[If they turn human now, Silas can't touch them!]

[Eat it! There are only two pills. If you miss this window, you stay snakes forever!]

Antidote?

My nerves caught fire. If they shifted back now, I was a dead woman.

I spun around and threw the door open.