When the Fog Clears, No One Loves You

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My daughter was in the ICU with pulmonary edema. Pregnant, I drove to the hospital through a hurricane, and my car slammed into the guardrail.

In the ambulance, the hospital called. A death notice.

My daughter couldn't be saved, and the baby inside me was gone too.

The husband I couldn't reach no matter how hard I tried had, instead, posted an ultrasound scan in the family group chat.

Our Myra Maddox is officially pregnant. The doctor says the baby is perfectly healthy.

I typed one reply into the chat.

Congratulations.

He deleted the ultrasound immediately, then texted me right away.

Leave the group.

I sent him our daughter's medical chart.

Come to the hospital. We need to talk.

I'm still reviewing case files. I don't have time for your nonsense! Cassie Sawyer's turned out slow because of the way you raised her. Don't bring her problems to me anymore!

Case files? Or Myra's ultrasound!

Has pregnancy rusted your brain? Myra is my sister!

I had no interest in going on with him. If he wouldn't come, then he could wait to be sued.

By the time I had my daughter's death certificate in hand, it was the small hours of the morning.

I went home in a daze, hollowed out.

My daughter's room stood wide open, toys scattered across the floor.

Sean was inside, several cabinet doors thrown open in front of him.

He heard my footsteps but didn't stop what he was doing, only asking with a note of complaint,

Aren't you on maternity leave? How is it you couldn't even make a bowl of hot porridge this morning?

My steps stalled. So he'd only just come home.

Two months now. He'd been like this the whole time.

When Myra landed in the middle of the night, he drove out himself to pick her up.

When I had a threatened miscarriage, he'd taken the car, and by the time I reached the hospital the baby had nearly been lost.

When Myra was in a bad mood, he left me alone at the campsite.

He ran off to the next city and sat through three straight days of concerts with her.

Getting no answer from me, Sean walked out of the bedroom and studied me carefully.

Why are your eyes so swollen? Is this pregnancy not going well?

He lifted a hand to touch my face. I tilted my head away and said flatly,

I called you yesterday. Why didn't you pick up?

Sean drew his hand back, a thin anger in his eyes.

Delilah Fox, you know how busy I am.

Myra lived with my family for three years. I think of her as my own sister, so of course I look after her a little more. Is there a problem with that?

Besides, she's newly pregnant and on her own, throwing up everything she eats. I went with her to the hospital for a checkup. You're a mother yourself, how do you not have even that much sympathy!

And your body's always been strong. You already gave birth to Cassie. You know the prenatal routine perfectly. Do you really need me there?

I looked at how little any of it touched him, and my heart felt like it had a gaping hole torn through it.

Cassie. He still had the nerve to bring up Cassie.

Cassie's pulmonary edema started because she drowned in the ocean.

It was Sean who said he hadn't taken her out in a long time, so he'd take her swimming.

But it was only when I got the lifeguard's call that I learned Sean had left Cassie alone at the beach.

Cassie was rushed to the hospital, her lungs so full of seawater that the pain left her unable to breathe.

The lifeguard said he'd called Sean more than thirty times and couldn't reach him.

He had no time to answer the lifeguard's calls, no time to answer mine.

But he had time to post Myra's ultrasound in the family group chat, and to make a point of telling me to leave the group.

Your own sister, Sean? Would your own sister sit in your lap?

Right there under the beach umbrella, he'd held Myra and kissed her.

My Cassie was standing at the water's edge, video-calling me on her kids' smartwatch, and she caught the moment of Sean's affair on camera too.

When the surf came surging in, I screamed at Cassie to run back.

But the wind knocked my daughter down anyway, and the towering waves swallowed her before my eyes, and in the end I lost her forever.

Sean's face drained of color, his eyes darting away.

"Did Cassie tell you that? We were playing a game with some coworkers, I lost, and that was the forfeit. That's all it was."

His tone smoothed itself out.

"Enough. None of that was real. From now on, I'll come with you to your prenatal checkups."

My fingers curled, nails digging into my palm.

He was still lying. For Myra.

If he loved Myra that much, then there was no reason left for me to keep this marriage together.

"Sean, I want a divorce."

Sean froze for a beat, his brow knotting, the anger in his eyes impossible to hide.

"Delilah, I'm not your control yoke. Stop sizing me up with those eyes of yours all the time!

"It was one joke. Can't you take a joke?

"Don't forget, right now you're nothing but a scheduling clerk at the airline. You haven't touched a plane in five years, and you're pregnant. What exactly would you do without me?"

"I spend all day dealing with clients at the firm. I'm exhausted. When I come home, I don't want to hear you nagging me about this garbage!"

He yanked irritably at his tie, and his eyes caught the stack of documents on the desk.

The critical condition notice sat right there on top.

Sean rubbed his brow, looking over at me, confused.

"Who's sick?"

He snatched the paper into his hand, trying to make out what it said.

A frantic knocking came at the door. Myra was outside, crying pitifully.

"Sean, the hospital says something might be wrong with the baby. I'm too scared to go alone."

"The baby's not going to leave me, right?"

Sean pulled the door open and soothed her, aching with worry.

"I'll take you to the hospital right now."

He scooped Myra up and left without a backward glance. He even forgot the laptop he'd never once let me touch.

Puzzled, I opened it.

The wallpaper on the screen made my chest ache until I trembled.

That year had been my first time as lead pilot on an international route.

One wing had lost balance and nearly caused a disaster. As the pilot in command, I was severely reprimanded, and the airline even considered grounding me.

Sean had been a passenger that day, and he tracked me down on my way home from work to thank me, sincerely.

He saw how low I was, handed me a cup of coffee, and gently reassured me.

"It was your first international flight. Handling a situation like that as well as you did already takes real skill."

Later, when the airline let me fly overseas again, I learned it was because he'd laid out meticulous evidence proving to my superiors that my handling that day had been flawless.

He was a top attorney at one of the country's most famous firms, and it was the first time he'd argued a case for someone who wasn't his client.

After that day, Sean confessed his feelings to me.

In the years that followed, we were often apart, and Sean would sigh, deflated, again and again.

"Lila, I don't want to keep living like this."

"But we're already married. You already have the baby coming, and your parents need someone to look after them. What if you stopped flying for now and switched to a different job?"

"I swear, I'll be good to you for the rest of my life."

I knew becoming the best lawyer in the country had always been his dream.

I laid a hand over my belly and gave in.

I didn't look for another job. I applied to transfer positions myself. Scheduling was an easy assignment, and I could still watch the planes climb into the sky every day.

At least I hadn't drifted too far from the work I loved.

Only, every time I held my captain's uniform with its shoulder boards and quietly cried into it, Sean would see and hold me, aching with guilt, apologizing, promising he would never betray the love I'd given him.

Yet he took that captain's uniform of mine and put it on Myra, then snapped tacky, ridiculous photos.

I opened the encrypted folder on the desktop with the date he and Myra first met.

Inside was nothing but photos of the two of them at music festivals.

Check-in videos from tourist spots all over.

Ten years of chat logs from when they'd first met, and every airline ticket record from all his trips abroad over the years.

Even Myra's current job had come about because he'd pulled strings through his own connections.

And the house his parents lived in, the property was registered under Myra's name too.

And the note on the file read,

I'll always be your safety net.

I stared at the screen. I don't know how long I sat there.

From the day Sean and I married until now, I had run the household for him, cared for his parents, smoothed over every tangle with the relatives.

Even I had nearly forgotten I was once a pilot.

A tear dropped onto the back of my hand, and I lifted it to wipe the wetness away.

So it turned out he wasn't incapable of tenderness. He'd just never once thought to catch me when I fell.

I closed the file, shut the laptop, and drove straight to the company.

Mr. Fox, I heard the foreign airlines are short-staffed. Are they still looking for pilots?

I'm hoping you'll give me a chance. I want to fly international routes.

Joshua Fox's eyes lit up.

Delilah, you handled that accident so well back then. All these years you never once brought up flying again, so I assumed you'd given it up.

If you're willing to go, then it's not too late to start over now.

Back home, I started packing.

This house meant nothing to me anymore.

The only thing I wanted to take with me was the memories of Cassie.

In all my years married to Sean, the one thing I never regretted was giving birth to Cassie.

She had been such a good girl from the start. On her first day of preschool, worried I'd fret over her, she'd asked her teacher to take a whole batch of photos to send me.

Later she grew up, school kept her busier and busier, and the photos grew far fewer.

Last year for her birthday, we'd planned to go skiing as a family.

But Sean said he had a tough case to fight and no time.

Cassie wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me, comforting me,

Mommy, it's okay. Daddy's not coming, but Cassie has you, and that's enough.

I held her and said yes, and up on the mountain we took so many photos.

In them, Cassie was so vivid, so lovely. Afterward I saved every one of those photos onto a USB drive.

But when I pulled open the drawer, I found the box that held the USB drive empty.

Remembering that Sean had come in here earlier, I was about to reach out to him.

Then I saw a video Myra had posted on her feed.

Sweetheart, this USB drive has so much space, plenty of room for lots of the baby's photos!

Later we'll put all my prenatal chart and ultrasound scans on it too. I even booked a maternity photo shoot, so we'll save those negatives on it as well.

So Sean had gone to the hospital to keep Myra company.

In the video, Myra leaned against Sean's shoulder, pointing at the screen and smiling like a newlywed wife eager for the child on the way.

But I recognized it at once: the USB drive they were using was the very one I'd used to store Cassie's photos.

When I reached the hospital, I saw Sean peeling shrimp for Myra.

Sean had a severe shellfish allergy.

At every family gathering, he'd wave the nanny over in disgust to take the whole plate of shrimp away.

When I was pregnant and craving it, I ordered a plate of spicy shrimp.

He watched me finish it, said nothing, and then in the middle of the night walked out of the house with his briefcase in hand.

He told me he had a flight to catch that night.

So it turned out that, from start to finish, it had always been different.

Myra saw me and shrank back under the covers in fright, explaining pitifully,

Delilah, I'm on an IV, it's hard to manage, so Sean was just helping me. Please don't blame him.

Sweetheart, Delilah just can't do without you. See? She came all this way.

Besides, she's got nothing to her name now. If you weren't taking care of her, how could she wear such nice clothes, live in that gorgeous penthouse? Chasing after you this fastshe really is a parasite vine.

I could never drape myself over a man and feed off him like that. So all I can do is carry everything on my own!

Sean tucked the edge of the blanket down around her, his eyes full of tenderness.

Yes. No one's stronger than you, Myra.

Sean looked over at me, and there was nothing in his eyes but helplessness.

"Lila, since you're already here, drop all that talk about divorce."

"You drive home first. Myra's pregnancy is unstable and she needs to stay in for a few days. I'll be here at the hospital looking after her."

Watching the two of them, all I felt was nausea.

Playing brother and sister, while carrying on an affair, and a pregnancy.

I looked at Myra, my voice cutting.

"Myra, you've got the nerve to seduce a man, so why did you also make my husband steal my USB drive?"

"What is this, your special talent? Being a professional mistress?"

The two nurses pushing open the ward door stared at Myra, aghast.

"So you two aren't married. Then isn't it inappropriate for this gentleman to be staying overnight..."

"And I actually thought they were a devoted couple. I even praised him for knowing how to take care of his wife. Turns out he brought his pregnant mistress to the hospital?"

Myra froze on the spot, her eyes flooding with tears in an instant.

The two nurses hurriedly swapped in the new IV bottle and left the ward with their tray.

Myra immediately threw herself into Sean's arms, sobbing until she couldn't speak.

"Sean, Lila is humiliating me on purpose!"

"I only kept that USB because it had a lot of storage. I wanted to make more records of the baby, that's all. You bought her so many USB drives, why does she have to curse at me like this?"

"Those two are my new coworkers. I just started at this hospital. How is everyone going to talk about me behind my back now?"

Sean patted her back gently, the flame in his eyes flaring up.

"Lila, I'm the one who gave the drive to Myra. What are you losing your temper at her for? These things are everywhere. Do you have to blow it so far out of proportion?"

"Besides, the pictures on it were blurry and ugly anyway. Keeping them was a waste. Just take new ones later, problem solved."

"It's not case files. How important could it be?"

Sean's words came off completely indifferent, his gaze contemptuous.

Beyond furious, I struck at his face, my accusation almost a cry of despair.

"Important, of course it's important! I can never take another picture of Cassie again!"

"When you were with your precious sister showing off her ultrasound scan in the family group chat, ignoring my calls and telling me to leave the group, Cassie was already gone!"

Sean shoved Myra away and suddenly stood up, staring at me, dumbfounded.

"How is that possible? How could Cassie..."

Before Sean could finish, Myra suddenly rolled off the hospital bed.

"Lila, how could you push me?"

"It's just a USB drive. I'll buy one myself. Here, take it back!"

She scrambled up off the floor and flung the drive from the cabinet. It landed in the trash can in the corner.

"How could Cassie be gone? I saw her outside the preschool just yesterday!"

"A woman like you, cursing your own daughter over jealousy. You'd love to strap a monitor on your husband, wouldn't you? How low can you get!"

The trash can was full of filth.

Fluid dripping from a discarded syringe fell onto the drive. Not a single one of the pictures Cassie left behind was left.

The rage and pain twisting together in my chest nearly swallowed me whole.

I walked to the bedside and seized Myra by the collar.

My other hand rose to strike her across the face.

Then someone gripped my wrist, and Sean shoved me away.

My forehead cracked against the cabinet, the sound landing heavy in the silent ward.

I pressed a hand to my forehead and got to my feet, blood seeping down between my fingers, staring at Sean in shock.

My condition startled him, and he looked back at me, thrown.

But the moment his eyes landed on the IV needle feeding blood back into Myra, the surprise in them drained away, leaving only disgust and judgment.

"Delilah, what gives you the right to hit Myra? What did she say that was wrong? How did you turn into this, spinning lie after lie, consumed by jealousy, without a shred of the diligence and kindness you had back when you were a pilot?"

"You even used Cassie's death to blackmail me. Don't forget, you've still got a child in your belly. Can't you act like a mother at all?"

"Apologize, or crawl back home. Your choice!"

I dug out the USB drive and left the hospital. Outside, rain came down in sheets, and I had no choice but to walk all the way home.

Water had gotten into the drive in my palm. Back home, I dried it off and plugged it into the computer again.

It was the only way I had left to remember Cassie.

But now, there was nothing. The drive was blank.

I stared at the screen for a long time.

Before I walked away, I ought to make Sean understand exactly who had been lying all along.

At dawn, a sharp sting jolted me awake.

I opened my eyes to see Sean dabbing the blood at the corner of my forehead with a cotton swab.

He looked at me with tender concern.

"Does it hurt a lot?"

"I'm sorry, I lost control today. But Myra didn't do anything wrong."

"You're her sister-in-law. How could you talk about her like that in front of outsiders? Her body was never as strong as yours. It wasn't easy for her to get pregnant."

I pushed his hand away.

"What are you trying to say?"

There was a flicker of expectation in Sean's eyes as he looked at me.

"Her birthday's tomorrow. She's planning to treat all her colleagues to dinner. I want you to come with me."

"You'll apologize to her. Just say you were under a lot of mental strain, that you misread the situation and misunderstood her, and that everything else you said was made up."

"Aren't you on good terms with your boss? While you're at it, arrange for your company's employee health checks to be done at Myra's hospital."

A wave of nausea spread through my whole body. I forced down my anger and pressed him.

"Sean, are you sure you want to do this?"

He set the swab down, his tone even.

"Myra's emotionally fragile right now. If you're going to apologize, you need to show some sincerity. Think of it as a gift from both of us to her and the baby."

"Didn't Cassie always want a family portrait? Once this is over, we'll go take one right away."

I stared at that familiar face for a long while, but I could no longer find the man he used to be.

After a moment, I answered.

"Fine. I'll do it."

Sean bent down to kiss me, but his private ringtone cut him off.

I rolled over and looked out the window. Sean pushed the door open and hurried out.

Not long after, my phone started buzzing with one text after another.

"Delilah, don't you ever get tired?"

"Leaning on the fact that you're pregnant, playing the victim to make him pity you. You think Sean still cares about you? If it weren't for the Sawyer seed in your belly, he'd have thrown you out ages ago!"

"Oh, and by the way, you probably don't know this. He even booked a custom world tour for me and the baby."

I stared at the words on the screen, gripping the phone tight.

Once, I would have blown up at Sean and demanded the truth.

But now, all I felt was how pathetic Myra was.

I called her directly.

"So what? My child is the one every Sawyer acknowledges. Do you really think Sean's parents would let a foundling's child by Sean set foot in that house?"

"If word got out about you and Sean, how do you think the Sawyers would see you? Would Sean still want you then?"

Myra went silent for a long time. I let out a scoff.

"So you should understand. As long as I have two children tying Sean to me, he'll never leave me."

"He likes to run around out there? Fine, let him have his fun. But there will never be a day when his wife isn't in his eyes."

When Cassie was born, he signed half of the firm over to me. He told me that once the baby in my belly is born, he'll put every share he owns in my name too. By then you'll be left with nothing.

Still, I should thank you. Having a little sister like you around saved him the trouble of looking elsewhere.

Myra's shrill scream came stabbing through the phone.

Delilah, one day he's going to leave you!

I hung up fast.

The texts kept coming, one after another. Intimate photos of her in bed with Sean, screenshots of transfers, and a trust fund contract.

The last one came with a message.

Delilah, how much longer can you stay happy? The moment I said I felt insecure, he handed all of this straight to me.

He's already signed it. Once my baby is born, there won't be any place left for you or that little bastard in the Sawyer family!

I switched off the screen and let out a cold laugh, too tired to argue with a fool.

The next day, Sean booked a suite at a five-star hotel to celebrate Myra's birthday.

The room was packed with people from Sean's firm, his clients, and Myra's coworkers.

She'd told her coworkers in advance that the whole thing had been a misunderstanding, and that today I would bring a handwritten apology statement to post on my personal account and never delete.

A server wheeled in the birthday cake. Sean had already arranged things with the staff, and the projector in the room flicked on.

My face appeared, crystal clear, in front of everyone.

Everyone, today, at my husband's request, I'm here to apologize to Miss Maddox.

Myra lifted her chin, looking down at me with pure arrogance.

The corner of my mouth curled up.

I'm sorry. After seeing the messages you sent me, I couldn't hold back my disgust, and I couldn't bring myself to spare your dignity either.

So to show how sorry I am, here's a big gift for the two of you.

Everyone, take a good look at this filthy little affair between Sean and his darling sister.

My image vanished from the projection.

Dozens of bedroom photos looped on the screen, until people were covering their eyes.

After the photos came the real estate contract Sean had signed over to Myra, the transfer records, and the trust fund agreement.